While it would be lovely to be able to stay at home with our little ones until they start school, for many parents that’s just not possible. That’s where daycare comes in, but it’s a big decision to make – and one that a lot of people, understandably, have no idea where to even begin. Today, we’re going to go through a few tips that can help you not just make a start but more easily transition through this change in your lives.
Get started early
It’s not uncommon for daycare facilities to have waitlists, and you may find your first choice isn’t available if you leave it too late. This varies, of course, from place to place, but if you know early on that you’ll be needing to get your baby enrolled at a specific date in the future, it’s a good idea to start checking out the centres in your area – whether that’s close to home, or close to work. Find out what the waiting lists are like – or if they have one at all. In New Zealand, the Education Review Office (ERO) produces publicly available reports for all schools, including Early Childhood Education (ECE) centres such as daycares. To read, all you need to do is look up each centre’s name on the ERO website. While these reports can be a little dry, they can help you finetune your decisions, especially if you’re torn between several options.
There are different things you will be looking for as a parent. You might prefer somewhere with a smaller roll. The number of qualified teachers present, as opposed to general childcare workers, could be important to you – or these things may be further down your list. The presence of staff who speak your language if you and your children are immigrants to the country you’re living in may also be a factor – choosing the right daycare for you will depend on what things are important to you and your family. Each of these is intensely personal, so thinking about them in advance is hugely helpful.
Go for a visit
Once you’ve decided, having advance visits is something many families enjoy, and more daycare centres are happy to have this happen. It’s a good experience for your child, as it allows them to get to know their new environment, the caregivers and teachers who they’ll be spending time with each day they’re there, and to get to know the other children – all while you’re nearby. But it’s not just good for the kids – parents often find it helps alleviate their own anxiety as well! Leaving your beloved little one with strangers is nerve-wracking, to say the least, so taking the time to get to know them so they aren’t strangers anymore takes a considerable weight off your shoulders. Which leads to the next point very well...
Establish a routine
You’re probably already aware of how important having a good routine is, as it helps babies feel safe and secure. There’s no difference when it comes to starting daycare, no matter your child’s age. Whether they’re starting at five months or three years, knowing what is expected each day really lets them thrive. After your pre-visits to your chosen daycare, you’ll be able to understand the centre’s rhythm and start gradually shifting your home rhythms to match. They don’t need to be exactly the same—life does happen, after all—but by getting things as similar as possible, the transition will be much easier for your child to cope with.
See if familiar items are allowed
The rules will differ depending on your particular ECE centre, but particularly for younger babies, a special item (such as their dummy, if they use one) can provide more of a sense of security. When you’re first checking out centres, if you think your child will cope better by having a favourite toy or blanket for naptime, find out if this is allowed. From there, you can then transition into not needing those items as they get used to being at daycare on a more regular basis.
Communicate with centre staff
One thing that is absolutely vital is having clear, open communication with the centre staff. They need to know anything important about your child that will let them provide the best possible care. This can include allergies, special needs, or particular likes and dislikes. Most places keep regular logs of what happens each day, including meals and nap lengths (especially for babies), so keeping up what the staff are telling you means you have a much better idea of how things are going – and as they get older, lets you then communicate with your child about their day!
Expect ups and downs
It’s not unusual for parents of children who started daycare as babies to think things are going well, then suddenly be hit by tears when it’s time to leave when they didn’t use to – and that is perfectly normal. And more often than not, those tears dry up as soon as you’re out of sight. ECE teachers are very experienced at dealing with these changes and have all manner of ways to distract your child when it’s time for you to leave them. If you have concerns, you can go back to the previous point, and let them know your concerns. They’ll be able to communicate with you more and will probably let you know some tricks to make morning drop-offs a little easier on you.
Give yourself time
Most of this advice revolves around making things easier for your child, but don’t forget parents also need time to adjust! You might be having to part from your child each morning when they’re still very young, or maybe you’ve had them next to you all day every day for three years, then have to adjust to them being somewhere else. It’s ok for you to feel some anxiety or distress over leaving your child, and it’s also ok to do something to help you deal with it. Some find it helpful to start their child the week before returning to work to get used to the idea – just as bubs gets used to the new way of things by visiting before they start officially. Or maybe you’d rather have you both start at the same time – whichever option works for your family is absolutely a-ok!
Daycare is a huge adjustment for both baby and parents. If your child is still being breastfed, check out this blog for tips on keeping that up as you return to work. Those tips include a good stash of Milk Storage Bags for the milk you’ve pumped. But beyond everything else, is remember to be patient as you all grow accustomed to your new normal – and that goes for yourself, not just your baby. Some days will be smooth sailing, while others will throw up unexpected challenges. Just remember, as time passes, you’ll all settle in and enjoy those daycare days.